Ban Bossy? Have the Girl Scouts Sold Our Daughters Out?

IMAGE: banbossy.com

Have you heard of the "Ban Bossy" campaign sponsored by the Girl Scouts?

I have always thought that the Girl Scouts organization was supposed to be "Leadership Training" for girls and young women. How does banning words develop a leader?

How can the Girl Scouts be taken seriously and how can any girl ever be a true leader if we continue to insist on things like "banning" words and engaging in this kind of weak thinking? Its not kind and compassionate-its dis-empowering.

A true leader has the strength of self-respect, self-awareness, self-reliance and is confident enough to take the lead when others cannot or will not. These are the qualities we need to work on-not avoiding words or opinions that hurt our feelings. Feelings are temporary-and so are words, and yet we are giving them eternal life every single time we attempt to "ban" certain ones by creating a campaign to do so.

And since when do we think we can or should "ban" words? Since when do we think its OK to discourage free thinking, having an opinion and Freedom of Speech? How can we allow free speech for some, yet want to ban words that we [incorrectly] deem as offensive for others? What message does this send our youth?

We also have to remember that in terms of language development, most kids don't understand the concept of "assertive" yet-so "bossy" is an easy-to-say, substitute word that describes the actions of a classmate who is "assertive". When kids call other kids "bossy", are they really using it as a put-down, or is it just that they don't have other vocabulary words yet to more accurately describe the character trait they are witnessing? Before we start banning words because our own emotions attach a negative meaning to them, we need to really look at where the kids/adults are as far as language development and usage.

I teach my daughter to think before she speaks, but that banning words and politically correct speech is not required of her. I have taught her from a young age that words have no inherent power to harm of offend unless we give them that power and allow them to. We give those 'banned' words power-and we can give them other meanings just as easily as trying to ban them.

I teach my daughter to think and speak truthfully, and the truth is, that most people don't even know they are, or should be offended until someone tells them that they are-or should be. I have always taught her that when someone calls her "bossy" she knows that they recognize her as a leader. I help her find other words that define what a true leader is and should be.

The "PC" push and guilt tripping if you accidentally use an "offensive" word is just another way to erode our rights and remove independent thinking. Being "offended" is only a way to gain attention-to impose guilt and division as it simultaneously exposes your deepest fears and weaknesses. It is also the most manipulative lie you can tell-its simply not true, because if you (or someone else) are that easily offended by a word, especially one that is not intended to insult or offend, then there is a much deeper problem.

 In the "Ban Bossy" download "Leadership Tips for Girls" Tip #2 contradicts the whole idea of "Ban Bossy" by suggesting girls: "Stop apologizing before you speak". I say yes-STOP apologizing and stop "banning" words. Show your true strength and character and when someone calls your daughter bossy, tell her to stand tall and say "I think you mean "assertive"- and that is part of what makes me a true leader."

We want to know what you think: Should we "ban bossy" or just leave it alone? 

Please leave your opinion in the comments area below.

Further Reading:

Sports for Girls Encourage Self-Empowerment
11 Facts about Teens and Self-Esteem

The Key to Raising Confident Kids? Stop Complimenting Them

The Optimistic Child: A Proven Program to Safeguard Children Against Depression and Build Lifelong Resilience 

Do Dolls Influence Girl's Self Image?